Story One: About Triangular, Rectangular, Round, and Oblong Dogs

. Sonia is a triangular dog. Is it possible that triangular dogs exist? Of course they do. What's more, there are also rectangular, round, and even oblong dogs. What is a triangular dog? It doesn't take much to explain; just look at Sonia. Her eyes are rather round, but where are they located? Of course, in (or "on," but perhaps "in," is better, because the eyes are also somewhat inside, and if something is inside, it's "in" rather than "on")—that is, in a triangular muzzle. The muzzle is wider at the top, then narrows, and at the bottom, it's just a tiny ("not so tiny!" Sonia would protest, and she'd be right, because compared to other dogs, it's not so tiny at all), so let it be—not tiny, but definitely a black nose. At the top of her muzzle, where it's wide, are two triangular (of course!), protruding ears. Sonia's ears are very mobile. Sonia can "perch" them so they pick up sounds from almost all directions. She can't just turn them back. Instead, she can flatten them back. As they say, "put your ears back." And when she flattens them like that, she looks very gentle and instantly becomes so tiny and innocent. And Sonia is very clever and sometimes likes to pretend to be so innocent. "I'm not faking it," Sonia would protest, but it's clear she's faking it right now.

What other reasons is Sonia a triangular dog? Because when Sonia sits, she looks like one big, sitting triangle. At the top sits the triangular head, which is small in relation to the rest of Sonia, and at the bottom sits the rest of Sonia—the so-called torso and paws. And somewhere on the floor (or on the ground—it depends), sits, or rather lies, Sonia's tail. And unfortunately, I have to admit, Sonia's tail isn't triangular, unless it's a very, very stretched triangle. It's worth adding that the rest of Sonia, the torso, is much wider than Sonia's head, which is why Sonia looks like a sitting triangle, or rather, two sitting triangles: one small and turned with the narrow end down (this is Sonia's head), and the other large, perhaps even enormous (this is the rest of Sonia). This rest of Sonia is an inverted triangle relative to the first triangle, because the triangle is wider at the bottom and narrower at the top (where the head is). I think that by now no one with even a modicum of imagination has any doubts that Sonia is a triangular dog. A triangular, rather cheerful, almost German Shepherd.

What about rectangular dogs? I know one. His name is Finio, and he's a Standard Schnauzer (because there are also small and large Schnauzers). Finio has a rectangular body, a bit like a box, except that the front—where the so-called chest is—is wider, and the back—where the hind legs are—is narrower. This is understandable, because Finio is very concerned about his fitness and wouldn't allow himself to have a large belly. He calls it "unsightly, unattractive, and unfashionable." It's worth noting that Finio doesn't understand the meaning of two of these three words, but that doesn't stop him from using them. Finio likes to weave complex words into his speech. This makes him think he's very educated, even though he's still so young—as he constantly emphasizes.

Above all, Finio can be described as average. Average in height; average in intelligence; and average, or even worse, in listening to his owner. Finio also has medium-sized, rectangular paws and a tiny, rectangular tail that's very active. Finio wags it constantly, and because it's small—that is, a tail, because Finio, as we all know, is average—when Finio wags it, he also wags his entire bottom. And when his bottom starts moving, it's as if Finio's entire body is moving. In summary, since—as we've already said—Finio's tail is constantly moving, it means that Finio's bottom is constantly moving, which in turn causes Finio to be in constant motion. Not only is he rectangular, but he's also active. That's Finio.

Another example of a rectangular dog is the very elegant—much more so than Finio, who only really wants to be elegant and only thinks he is—Golden Spaniel Atanazy. Not only does Atanazy have a golden coat, but he's also won several gold medals at dog shows. Therefore, it's perfectly legitimate to call him "Golden Atanazy." It's also perfectly legitimate to call him an aristocrat. Atanazy, upon request, can show his impressive pedigree, which includes much about his parents, grandparents, grandparents' parents, grandparents' grandparents, grandparents' grandparents' parents, and so on. Atanazy is very proud of this, and it's no wonder, after all, some people barely remember their grandparents' names, let alone their grandparents' grandparents. Some dogs, however, say that Atanazy exaggerates his aristocracy a bit, and they're probably right, but more on that later. In any case, whatever you say about Atanazy, one thing is certain: the Golden Atanazy is a rectangular dog.

And what do round dogs look like, for example? In my opinion, not at all the best, and they probably don't like it either, because they're usually sad and melancholic. Just take a closer look at, for example, Feliks the poodle (Felix the poodle is a perfect example of a round dog. You could even say he's the epitome of a round dog). A poodle is round all over, and especially when he has such a stupidly cut hair like Feliks, who is constantly cold because of his haircut, you could say he's cold ALL THE WAY. Feliks has a round body, or more precisely, his torso, almost round paws, round ears, and only his muzzle is pointed. This muzzle is probably so pointed because Feliks often gets angry, upset, and furious, which significantly elongates his muzzle.

I mentioned earlier that there are also round dogs. And indeed, there are. "Cubby" isn't exactly a nice word, but Pysia, who is undoubtedly a curvy dog, is incredibly nice. Well, Pysia is a multi-breed dog, a crossbreed, or—as some prefer—a composite. Some might say that just because Pysia is so multi-breed, it also means she's NOT a purebred at all. But I completely disagree; I'd rather say that Pysia is a SUPER purebred dog, smart, a bit sad, and mysterious.

Pysia, or rather all parts of her body... (actually, it would be more appropriate to say "bulky," because Pysia, besides being a super-pedigree, is also exceptionally large. However, I won't say "bulky," because that's an unattractive word, and Pysia is so nice. Some words simply don't suit some people, and there's nothing you can do about it; they shouldn't be used, that's all)... so, all parts of Pysia's body are round, but a bit elongated, cylindrical, simply rounded. And on top of that, they're covered in black and white spots. If someone really wanted to, they could compare Pysia to a spotted cow. However, I doubt Pysia would like such a comparison, so it's best not to repeat it.

So, we more or less already know what they look like: the triangular, cheerful Sonia; the rectangular ones: the featherless Finio and the proud Golden Atanazy; the round Feliks with a mischievously elongated muzzle, and the round, mysterious Pysia. It so happened that one early spring day, all these dogs met at the same time, in the same yard. And it was on that day that the adventures described below began.