A party. A word that always brings a smile to our voluptuous lips. The organizer of such an event is always a key figure, providing some modest refreshments and liquids that may later effectively soothe throats burned by the specific beverage, which is always treated with the utmost respect by all participants. At least for the first moments of such a party. As it progresses, it loses its importance, only to end up causing unpleasant contortions of undisguised disgust on many faces.
Leaning against the wall and nervously scratching the back of my head, I wonder what I'm doing here? Seeing everyone having a wonderful time to the sounds of the song currently playing at number one on the musical trio. Among the reveling crowd, I spot Chakra. She was the only one I knew of in the crowd, and of course, the organizer of this event; it was for her that I came. Although now I'm not happy about it.
When I first saw her, in the dentist's waiting room, I knew I had to meet her. I used all my wits, and I succeeded. The dentist gave me her nickname and the date of her next appointment. I told her to make an appointment before me. The first time, she canceled, and I was saddened, but the second time, everything went according to plan. On the way to the dentist, I saw the car she was driving. When I entered, I struck up a conversation. I managed to get an invitation from her to a party she was organizing at her hometown. I was delighted.
But now that I'm here, I suddenly realize I don't really care. I don't really fit into her world, her friends, with whom I can't find common ground. Even the few glasses I've had with them haven't resolved anything. My mood hasn't improved either. I still stand scowling against the wall, watching the group of people partying across from me. My chakra keeps running through my head; I feel like I'll get into trouble because of it, though I can't predict what kind. Suddenly, a bowl of water standing nearby catches my eye. It's full, and I don't really see why it should be there. Nor who it's meant to serve.
Too often I waste my energy on unnecessary effort. It cost me a bit of my health to be invited to this party, but now I suddenly realize I don't really care. On the contrary, I'd like to be able to leave. And then there's Chakra, her presence, which doesn't bode well. I only really know her by sight; she lives in the same building as me, and we barely greet each other. I wonder how she knows Miga? Maybe it's family, but I don't know anything about that.
Another song has ended, and most of them have sat down at the table to grab a sip, something that will get them up and make the party even more enjoyable. These people know what alcohol is for and use it in moderation. They actually drink water with a chemical added. The human body is also made of water. If memory serves, it's about 70% of the body's weight.
Amidst the silence, I suddenly hear a rustling sound. I listen, probably coming from behind me. I turn around. I notice the bathroom door slightly ajar. When I enter and turn on the light, my eyes see the faucet running, water flowing into the bathtub. The bathtub is practically full already. I hastily turn the tap off. Another moment and water would have started spilling from the tub onto the floor. My eyes fall on the washing machine. Through the glass, I see that it, too, is almost completely full, though no one is planning on washing clothes at that moment. I watch it with interest. I try to find a logical explanation, but nothing comes to mind. Suddenly I hear someone else enter. I turn around.
"What are you doing here?" I stare at her. I wonder what to say to her. My suspicions might be completely unfounded. But if anything, only she might know.
"Why is there so much water in your place?" I ask the first question slowly.
"How much?" she asks, curious. She stares at me intently.
"Look, the bathtub is almost full. When I came in, the tap was on, and if I hadn't turned it off, the water would have spilled out of the bathtub onto the floor. The same goes for the washing machine; it's almost full. You're not planning on doing laundry now, are you?" She
continues to stare at me. She tilts her head to the side. She considers what I've told her for a moment.
"Don't you like water?" she smiles gently.
"I do. A lot, actually," I reply.
"So what's the problem?" Her answer unnerves me. "Let's get back to the rest of the house. There's much less of it there." "She started walking, and I followed. When I reached the table, I heard the words:
"Man, you missed a round! The so-called "karniak" is waiting for you now!" He handed me a glass. I took it and held it in my hand for a moment.
"Why are you waiting? It's just water with a little bit of a special ingredient." I looked into the bottom of the glass, then abruptly raised it to my lips and tilted it.
"Now, a regular round." Before I could protest, the glass was already full. And now, together with everyone, I drank a toast to the success of this event. My head was already starting to hum slightly.
"Did you know that in India, there's practically no rain year-round? It only rains once a year. But when it does, it rains for several days straight. And it rains in incredible amounts!" - this is the same person who filled my glass. "Meteorologists are very curious about this phenomenon. Well, nature holds many secrets for us."
Miga sits down next to me and starts a conversation.
"You know, I like water. I always go to a lake for vacation. I try to visit a different one every year. I rent a boat and spend my entire stay on it. In two weeks, I explore every corner. When it comes time to return, it's hard for me to leave it. I haven't been to the sea yet; I haven't had the opportunity. Although I would love to.
" - I have been, quite a while ago. But I wasn't so fascinated then. My dream is to welcome the New Year on the ocean, exactly at the line that adds one day to the distance. It must be fascinating. Crossing that line adds a day to real time. So you're the first person to welcome the new year.
"You're right. It must be fascinating." Her eyes take on a strange glow. Suddenly I notice that the whites of her eyes are bluish. I tell her this.
"You know, actually, few people notice until I tell them.
" "Well, maybe few people stare with such intensity as I do. I could immerse myself in them; they draw me in with a force I've never experienced before." "I can't defend myself against it. Even if I could, I wouldn't want to.
" "Have you really never felt such a pull?" she asked, the answer carrying great value to her.
"Never before, you're the first person." I suddenly realized I was glad to be here. To be able to sit here next to her, to talk to her. My bad mood vanished. The dark cloud lifted from my head.
Suddenly, a hand jerked me from my seat and pulled me along. Only after a moment did I realize it was Chakra.
"What's the matter?" I was upset and angry with her. She interrupted my conversation.
"You promised," she said to me. I didn't understand.
"Promise what?" I waited for her answer.
"You promised yourself you wouldn't tell anyone else what you've already told Evi." I remembered the promise. When I was with her, I promised myself that. But that was a long time ago. Now I have a different face in my mind.
"Wouldn't you agree that she looks like her?" I turned away from her and looked at Miga. When I noticed the resemblance, I turned away from her too.
"She's similar, so what?" For years we search for our dream ideal. We travel through thousands of galaxies, searching for that one person who will be our resting place. But as time passes, we begin to doubt existence. Eventually, we only meet someone barely resembling her. We say, however, that she is her. We stay with her. Over time, we encounter someone who is more like our ideal. We tell her the same thing. She stays with us. We are with her only until we meet someone even more similar, to whom we say the same words we know so well. A vicious cycle with no escape. In our search for a nonexistent ideal, we harm so many innocent beings. To break free from this cycle, I promised myself I would only use the simile once.
"You promised," she repeated one word over and over again. I hadn't said anything like that to her yet, but our conversation was heading that way. And if she hadn't snatched me away, I would have told her everything she wanted to hear.
"You promised not to tell anyone but Evi, remember?"
"What Evi is she talking about?" Her voice chilled me. But I reacted quickly.
"I'll explain everything to you in a moment..." She didn't let me finish.
"You're not talking, I'll explain it myself." Then she walked away, unwilling to listen to anyone anymore, especially me.
I wanted to shout at Chakra, but when I turned around, she was gone. I clenched my fists helplessly. My face contorted into a grimace. I remember the rest as if through a haze. I grabbed the bottle of alcohol and started pouring it down my throat. I tried to drown out my howl of despair. Then darkness enveloped me.
The first thing I saw when I opened my eyes was Miga standing over me, shouting words at me. I realized my entire body was submerged in the bathtub. I heard the sound of water running from the faucet. The water was pouring out of the tub. I guess that's what she was blaming me for. My head was pounding terribly, and her words intensified the pain even more. I grabbed her and pulled her into the tub. We submerged ourselves in the water we both loved so much...
...my hands broke the surface first. A head appeared right behind them. I gasped. My hands clung to something. I realized it was a wooden boat, complete with oars. And Miga was sitting in it. I climbed into the boat. I looked around. We were in the middle of an endless ocean. There was no land in sight. It was getting dark, and the blood-red sun was covering the entire ocean. It was slowly disappearing below the horizon.
"What are we doing here?" I asked Miga. Perhaps she understood much more.
"I wanted to ask you the same thing, but I see that question would be pointless." She looked around. And like me, she saw nothing but the endless ocean. She didn't understand what had happened, just like I did. I was only glad that all the anger she felt towards me had subsided. At least she didn't seem angry with me. I remained silent, waiting for her first question. Now that we were completely alone, we could explain everything, knowing that no one could interrupt our conversation.
"Well..." she paused for a moment, gathering her words. "Since we're stuck with each other, could you explain one thing to me? Right? I don't need to ask a question; you know what I want to ask?" She looked deep into my eyes. She tried to watch for any signs of me trying to lie.
My thoughts drifted back to the past. To the moment when certain words had already been said. And with complete sincerity. With full awareness of that. When I met her, I was so captivated by her personality that one passionate night I told her she was the one, the ideal of my dreams. And then I made a promise to myself that I would tell her only, not anyone else. But our time didn't last forever; eventually, we parted ways. There were a thousand reasons. And then I met you, Miga. It's true, you caught my attention only because you were so similar to her. The resemblance was striking. I longed to meet you. I did. And then, despite everything, I wanted to be with you. My promise, at some point, ceased to matter to me; now only you were most important. You know, there are times when a person is truly determined and ready to sacrifice everything just to achieve the object of their dreams. We live in a hypnotic trance. Our reactions are delayed and vague. We don't really know what we want. Then suddenly someone appears who gives our lives meaning, their brilliance outshining everything else. Someone said it was infatuation. Nothing like it, quite the opposite. Because suddenly, someone rouses us from an unreal dream, makes us truly want to live, to participate in something called life. You woke me up. You are my savior. No one before you has managed this. And tell me, can I not call you my dream ideal? In the dream I was immersed in, I always dreamed of you. And suddenly it turns out that someone like you exists, and is not just a dream. Just tell me I'm wrong, and I will be silent forever.
"You are silent, you say nothing? But no one will silence me anymore."
"I could tell you about her. But would that change anything? Words won't prove anything. I'm here only with you now. Doesn't that mean anything to you?" We looked into each other's eyes, each of us staring at our own reflection in the other's. It would have lasted forever if we hadn't suddenly felt the ocean grow increasingly violent. The waves pounded the boat harder and harder. Rowing became powerless. I couldn't fight the force. There wasn't even anything to hold on to. We hugged each other; it was the only sensible decision we could make in this situation. The waves crashed over us again and again, each time with redoubled force. We were soaked to the skin, and only our overheated hearts kept our bodies from cooling down. I don't know how long the battle against the elements lasted.
At some point, I felt the waves weaken, until finally, towards dawn, when the sun began to peek over the horizon, the ocean calmed down again. We managed to survive, but during the struggle, we lost our oars and there was no way to continue. So I jumped into the water, grabbed the boat with my hands, and by kicking my legs, I made the boat move again. I couldn't see anything, so I relied on Migi's eyes. If she saw anything, she would immediately give me a sign, even if it was just a dream. And indeed, she shouted several times that she thought she saw land. But as I climbed onto the boat and we both stared at the spot where she most likely saw land, it turned out to be only a dream. Her next cry was much
louder than the previous ones. This time, I knew she had seen something real. And as soon as I climbed onto the boat, real land came into view. From that distance, I could see a sandy beach. So I grabbed the boat rope and jumped into the water with him. I intended to swim to shore first and secure the rope, so our boat wouldn't be swept away by a strong current at the last moment. I managed to reach shore without any major problems. I collapsed, exhausted, on the sand. For a moment, I inhaled the smell of sand. I rose to my feet and began securing the rope around a rock.
"Miga, if you weren't on this boat with me, I wouldn't have made it. I would have broken down mentally; this ocean would have driven me mad. Only you gave me the strength I needed. A person alone isn't worth much, but I guess you know that and I shouldn't be telling you this?" I turned to see her reaction. But suddenly, I noticed there was no one in the boat. The boat was completely empty. The words of a long-heard song began to echo in my head:
Everything that protects us from falling
Lets us reach the nearest piece of land...
You emerge above the ocean surface, up the mountain
The boat is already waiting, and she is with it
You grab the oars, but you can't see the shore
But the hope for land still lives within you.
You remain faithful that you will finally see the shore.
And then you will set your feet on the sand.
With your oars you still break the sea waves.
And you row on and on, always, just to go on.
Questions are asked, but no one hears the answers .
Has your heart ever loved?
Does it still love, or has it stopped loving?
You tell her the words you know well.
Everything inside us dies when a long time has passed since the breakup.
The first ray of sunlight appears on her lips.
But dark clouds gather in the sky.
The waves grow wilder.
A flash tears the sky.
And in a small boat, two passengers huddle together . Wanting to endure
despite fate.
Every moment a wave washes over you, trying to crush you.
But only the strength within you can help you survive.
And when it seems you have no more strength to fight nature.
The waves weaken, and the dark clouds disappear from the sky.
Immediately afterward, you see land, your joy knows no bounds.
You are the first to jump out of the boat and run to land.
You tie a string to secure the boat.
You tell her that without her, you simply wouldn't have the strength to sail this route.
You turn around, the boat is empty, she's disappeared somewhere.
In your head, you hear only words...
Everything that protects us from falling .
Allows us to reach the nearest piece of land...
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