In Hell, deep underground, enormous cauldrons boiled people, and on hooks hung human remains of torture. The heat was unbearable.
In a small, rocky room, Lucifer sat on a simple wooden chair, intently playing with clay. From time to time, he paused, reached for a black cigar, and, gazing thoughtfully at his work, blew smoke rings.
He smiled to himself, wiped his black, devilish paws on a nearby rag, and turned to the door, shouting,
"Beelzebub, you bastard! Where are you?"
A moment later, heavy footsteps were heard, followed by the clanking of a chain, and then a black servant with red horns on his head and a trident in his left paw appeared in the doorway. He stank of tar, was smoking, and there were traces of fresh human blood on his left chest.
"I am, sir," he replied, standing at attention.
"I see that, servant!" What are you doing, you bastard, son of a wicked angel?
"I'm torturing people, my lord. As you ordered," Beelzebub replied curtly, looking at the clay figures and widening his eyes. "My lord?"
Lucifer, as if on cue, inhaled a cigar, rose from his chair, and stood by one of his creations. "
It is done, Beelzebub, I have finally created minions of flesh and blood, who will become human, and my devilish power will flow in their veins! I won't lie, I'm not a humble creature. If I had these human weaknesses, I certainly wouldn't be the ruler of Hell. The fact that I lie, break the rules, and tempt... Well, that's the basis of my existence, after all..."
Beelzebub shifted from foot to foot. His small, devilish brain was working overtime to keep up with Lucifer's philosophical reasoning. The boss was a difficult person to talk to. Every now and then, he stared longingly at the door and listened to the people's groans. Why couldn't he do his job? A little irritated, he simply said,
"Erm... lord?"
This irritated Lucifer. This diabolical stupidity, which had caused his entire kingdom to collapse, giving way to heavenly brightness. He didn't hide the fact that he led a band of stinking morons. He said dryly, "
You're a fool, Beelzebub, only torture is on your mind. Just think, I created people from clay, just like God himself once did. I will breathe life and wisdom into them, all their cunning and deception, and then I will place them up there"—he pointed to the cave ceiling. "They will rule over a chosen nation of living people!" He took another drag on his black, tarry cigar. "They will oppress them, seduce them with promises, and lie to their faces. I will turn them into politicians!
" "Oh my..." Beelzebub groaned.
Lucifer smiled devilishly.
"Bring me the magic bones, you stinking dog! The country chosen on the die will be my country, my chosen one! I will create hell for it! Now get out and do as I command!"
Beelzebub left hurriedly. After a long moment, he knocked on the door and carried into Lucifer's room a small bag containing several cube-shaped dice made of human bones.
Lucifer took the dice in his paw, looked at the eight clay statuettes before him, and then rolled the dice in front of him, muttering under his breath.
"Let it be... let it be..."
The name of a country was written on the side of each dice. They all pointed to Poland.
Lucifer looked carefully at the floor.
"Where is Poland, devil's son?
" The servant reached for a map placed in the corner of the room.
"It's in Europe, my lord.
" "That's good! This is going to change! Europe! I haven't been out of here in a while; much must have changed since the fall of Rome... And the devil's country at its very heart. In this country, people will never amount to anything!"
Beelzebub looked at the clay figures for a moment. Something didn't add up. They were too similar to...
"Sir?
" "Yes, Beelzebub, you udder of God?"
"Uh... sir, people don't have horns on their heads. It's just a small suggestion, sir... uh.
" The Lord of Darkness looked at his work. Damn it, how could he have missed something like that? He said curtly,
"Well, I guess I'm getting into a rut."
Then, with a few swings of his handy knife, he cut off the clay horns of the future politicians
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