friend, Angel.

 

Agata opened her eyes. She saw a white ceiling and a fluorescent light. Then she looked around. On one side was a window. Behind it, a leafless tree swayed. It was raining. On the other side, there were several beds. Some were empty, some with girls or women on them. One was sleeping, another was doing a crossword puzzle. The third was reading a book. On the bed next to the door, a blond girl sat staring at the wall while a nurse ruthlessly administered her an injection.

'Where am I?' "What happened?" Agata thought. It was very difficult for her to think. She felt a slight pain in her right forearm. She looked at it. There was a needle in it, a clear tube connected to a white bottle hanging on a hook by the bed. Agata concentrated. With great effort, the last image she remembered came to her mind. A large number of pills in her hand. And a glass of water beside her. And her last thought: 'I'm done with this...'. So that was it. She failed. She sat down on the bed, rested her elbows on her knees, rested her head on her hands, fingers separating the strands of her not-so-long red hair, and closed her eyes. She wanted this. She wanted death. Was she so hopeless that she couldn't even manage to commit suicide?

"And how are you feeling?" she heard a dry, emotionless voice. She raised her head. She saw the nurse who had just given the girl an injection.

"Fine," she replied, not very well. True to the truth, and then she exploded, "Why didn't you let me die?! Don't you realize I wanted this?! Why would I do this?!?!?! My life has no meaning. It would be over, I would have peace of mind! Why did you save me?!

"Listen, child, I'm not a psychologist. I do what I'm paid to do. Set your arm, I want to give you an injection.

" "I don't want to! Let me do what I've wanted since I was born! Let me finally die!"

"Listen, girl, either you finally calm down or...

" "What's going on here?" a loud but warm voice rang out. Agata looked toward the door. A gray-haired doctor was standing there.

"Head of the ward, the patient is refusing the injection," the nurse complained.

"Should I announce to the whole world that I want to die!?" Agata shouted. "Understand this finally! I don't understand why you cured me! If I wanted to die, you should have let me."

"Sister Małgosia, you're leaving." "Are you okay?" the doctor said to the nurse, and when she left, he sat down on the edge of the bed.

"Listen, Agusia...

" "Please don't call me Agusia. I'm Agata."

"Okay, Agata. So listen. My job, and everyone's, here is to save people from death. So we did what we had to do. I'm not a psychologist, but I would advise you to consider your existence a second chance. Try to start over. Change schools, change your friends. Forget about what happened. I believe you'll succeed. The psychologist will come to you this afternoon...

" "I don't want to! I want to go home," said Agata, already somewhat calmer.

"Are you sure?"

"Yes

." "Can you promise me you won't try to commit suicide again?"

Agata remained silent.

She remained silent even when her mother, crying with joy, and her father, praising heaven, hugged her a few hours later.

"Agatka, I'm so glad you're alive.

" "Honey, why did you do that?"

"Promise mommy you won't do it again."

She remained silent. They didn't understand. They didn't understand that her life, her existence on this earth, had no meaning. That she wanted to end it because she was fed up with this gray life.

That evening, when she left the hospital, shuffling in her combat boots and dragging a black scarf behind her, she didn't feel any better. She still regretted not having managed to do it more thoroughly. Driving in the car, she looked dispassionately out the window at the rushing people, other cars, houses where life went on as usual. The streetlights bathed her silent face, while her mother chattered on:

"We were so worried about you, Agata... And how scared Grandma was... and today, when she found out everything was okay, how happy she was... so was I, of course... even my boss was happy and excused me from my last hour of work so I could come see you..."

She entered the house first. Without looking at the laid table or hearing her mother's cries of "I made spaghetti today especially for you, without meat!"—she had never been willing to accept her daughter's vegetarianism—Agata went straight upstairs to the attic, to her room. There, in complete darkness, she lay down on her bed and looked out the window at the birch tree that grew just below and the cloud-covered sky. She thought that her life would forever be hopeless. That they would start hiding pills, razor blades, and string from her, and when she tried to cross the bridge, they would send an escort after her. She would suffer living to a ripe old age. Filled with such thoughts, she fell asleep.

A look in her eyes woke her. She stood up and looked around the room. And suddenly she almost screamed when she saw a boy sitting in a chair by the desk... but this was no ordinary boy. He had dark, slightly curly hair, dark eyes, a kind face, and he was dressed in a white robe, and on his back were... real wings!

"What? Who are you?" Agata finally asked, rubbing her eyes.

The boy smiled.

"I'm your Angel...

" "What are you going to tell me?" Agata asked, getting angry.

"Is it nice to talk to a messenger from Heaven like that?" he asked with a smile.

"I'll call Daddy in a minute and you'll go away, you're some kind of lunatic," Agata said

. "No one but you will see or hear me. I'm only your angel. "

Listen, because I'm really going to take you to Kobierzyn . "

Kobierzyn?

" "Don't you know what that is? Or maybe you're not from here? There's a hospital for lunatics in Kobierzyn.

" "Oh, so you still don't believe me? Then look at this." The Angel stood in front of the mirror. Agata let out a strangled cry. The glass didn't reflect him.

"Do you want more proof?" the Angel asked the terrified girl. "Try touching me."

Agata slowly reached out and tried to grab the Angel's hand, but the hand went through the boy's shoulder.

"So you really...

" "Yes. I want to take care of you."

Agata was silent for a long moment, then narrowed her eyes.

"You were the one who saved me... how could you? I won't forgive you for this!" She lunged at him, but only 'passed' through his body and landed against the wall.

"Calm down," the Angel said. "I gave you life, I gave you a second chance, I wanted to let you live happily. And how do you repay me?"

"Leave me alone! I don't need you! Go away!

" "I'll stay," he said, sitting cross-legged on the floor. Agata, despite her anger, smiled to herself when she saw that instead of strappy sandals or something like that, he was wearing sneakers. Then, however, nervously, she opened the window, took a pack of cigarettes from a hiding place under the windowsill, kept for a rainy day, and lit one. She didn't feel like smoking like that again. She didn't even like it much. She just wanted to spite the Angel. Because he would surely forbid her from smoking. And he won't snatch the cigarette from her, because he'll 'penetrate' it. She wanted to leave him in his helpless rage, just like she had been a moment ago. To her surprise, the Angel also went to the window, grabbed a pack of L&Ms, and took out a cigarette, which he lit. He laughed at her expression.

"I don't like smoking. I just wanted to see your reaction. I wanted you to be the one who was helpless after all," he said with a smile.

"Wait... can he read minds?" Agata thought

. "Yes, I can," the Angel said, and the cigarette slipped from Agata's hand, rolled across the wet roof, and then fell to the ground in the garden.

"Easy. I don't intend to do this all the time. Only I'll want to hear some kind of answer from you; I'll be reaching into your thoughts," he said.

"Are you going to stay here long?" she asked. "

I intend to stay here forever," he said, and Agata collapsed onto the bed.

"Now, I'd recommend you go downstairs quietly and see how your mother is behaving." Maybe it will give you something to think about.

Agata gave him a searching look, then opened the door and headed for the stairs. She peered over the banister. She saw her mother in her father's arms, sobbing:

"Krzysiu... why can't I? Am I a bad mother...? I would give anything for Agata to be happy... and she wants to kill herself... where did I go wrong?"

"Calm down, Grażynka," her husband shushed her.

Agata just narrowed her eyes. She went back into the room. Angel lay on the bed.

"What do I care? If he loves me so much and wants the best for me, let me die...

" "Sigh... that's going to be hard work," Angel sighed to himself

. "What are you mumbling? And besides, get off my bed. Make yourself a tree house. Live in a doghouse. And who cares if there's no doghouse nearby? I didn't invite you." Do whatever you want—what irritated her most was Angel's calm smile. As if he didn't care. As if her behavior amused him—so what?! Are you coming down, or do I have to punch you in the face?

"That's the second time you've used a not-so-nice word. But okay. I'm coming down."

Agata flopped onto the bed, turned her back to the room, and, exhausted, fell asleep.

The 'smell' of fried eggs woke her. She opened her eyes .

"Look, I made you scrambled eggs," Angel said

. Agata looked at the plate handed to her. Burnt eggs and chives chopped into large pieces. On the 'scrambled eggs' were eyes, nose, and mouth painted with ketchup. She looked up and saw Angel grinning at her with the same smile the scrambled eggs had. And then, for the first time in a long, long time, she laughed. She laughed long and hard. Finally, she wiped the corners of her eyes and ate the scrambled eggs, even though they weren't the best food she'd ever eaten.

Then she sat on the windowsill, her legs resting on a piece of roof, which, because she lived in the attic, was right under the window. She rested her elbows on her knees, her head in her hands, and gazed thoughtfully into the distance.

"Why don't you go outside and just stare longingly at it?" the Angel asked

. "I don't want to go there. I feel best in my solitude, here, in my place in the world.

" "Perhaps you will go out after all? What? Will you show your face to people?

" "What??? I have nothing left to show, only my face, which is worn out?

" "Well, worn out right there. Maybe not very beautiful, but..." and at that moment, a slipper 'penetrated' through the Angel.

"How do you do it? When you sit on the ground, you don't penetrate into the room below, when you pick something up, it doesn't fall out, but when I want to touch you or throw something, it all flies by without you?" Agata asked.

"Hehe. Because I have such a gift. If I want, I can catch something, and if not, I make it permeate... so how? Will you finally go out for some fresh air, instead of sitting in your T-shirt by the window when it's minus two hundred degrees in the field?

" "Let it sit. I don't know why I have to go there, but let it sit."

So a few minutes later, she was walking down the park path. Furious, pissed, it seemed like she was about to burst into flames.

"Now you'll be able to read my mind, because I feel silly shouting at the top of my lungs what I think of you when apparently no one can see you." So...

'You moron! You idiot! I want my attic! Leave me alone! Let me live my life my way!' Agata shouted angrily in her mind.

"Listen, you have free will. I'm not forcing you to do anything. I'm just suggesting it. Just go home if you're feeling so bad," the angel said

. "Okay." "So I'm going back," Agata thought and turned around. Halfway there, they passed a crying little boy.

"Won't you even ask the little one why he's crying?" the angel asked.

"Oh God. Maybe I should be Mother Teresa of Calcutta? " "

Do you think asking a little boy what happened is the same as what Teresa did?"

"Oh God, okay, okay, stop being so cocky. How I hate all prudes

!" "Hey! You! What are you crying about?" she called after the little boy.

"Me?

" "No, me, you know?" Come here.

The little boy approached her.

"What's your name?" Agata asked .

"Piotruś...

" "Beautiful. And do you know I hate brats like you?

" "Agataa!" the Angel hissed.

"Okay, okay," she muttered. "

So, er, okay, okay," she muttered. "I'm Agata... God, what am I doing? Piotrek, what are you crying about?"

"Because I got lost...

" "Oh, come on." Do you know where you live?

The boy shook his head sadly

. "Damn. You had to get me involved in this too," she said to the Angel, forgetting that she was supposed to be addressing him in her mind.

"Damn, but who are you talking to?

" "Jesus. No one. Or maybe you remember your phone number?"

"I remember...

" "Fantastic! Wait, Aunt Agata will take out her little phone and we'll dial a number.... Christ! I'm starting to diminutively use nouns. Phew. Give me that number." "

643-68-32," the little one recited .

Agata took out the cell phone she never used and dialed a number.

"Eeeeeeeee, excuse me, am I speaking to someone from Piotruś's family?" she asked.

"Yeah... I'm his mother," she heard a hopeful voice

. "Eeee, I found him... I mean, he was walking alone, crying, through the park, and he told me he was lost, and he gave me his phone number, and he's sitting here with me, and I think he's... well, I found him.

" "My dear child! Thank you! In which park?"

"Well, in Mistrzejowice, here. I'm sitting with him by the fountain. How about I walk him back? Where do you live?"

"No, no, I'm going to get him now. Thank you again, honey.

" "Uh, you're welcome."

Agata hung up and threw her phone into her bag

. "Listen, kid. Mommy's coming for you soon. I'll go, and you wait here for her...

" "Have you lost your mind, Agata? You're supposed to stay here and wait for his mother..." Angel interjected

. "What? I don't have anything better to do than wait here for some woman who can't keep an eye on a child?

" "Who are you talking to," Piotruś interjected, who was a very curious child

. "Fuck. Not you. I'm just thinking out loud." Agata sent a sweet smile to the kid.

"What do I have to do with you? What do you mean? Will you forbid me to go home?" "

If you really want to, you'll go home, no matter what I tell you." "I'm just helping you choose the right path," the Angel replied seriously.

Agata sat down on the bench with a big sigh.

"Okay, if you think I'll be happier being bored here, then okay."

"Little one," she said to Piotruś, "but I'll sit here with you .

" And Piotruś then hugged her and said sincerely , "

I love you...

" Agata was speechless and looked at the Angel. He smiled as if to say, "I told you so."

After two weeks, Agata decided to return to school. However, when she stood in front of the gloomy building of the Third High School in Krakow, she thought the decision wasn't entirely wise. She felt as if she were being shackled again. "

It'll be alright, Agata, you'll see. Don't be afraid. I'm with you," the Angel said, giving her strength.

Agata sighed and opened the door. First lesson, physics. She had a feeling it would be bad. Of course, no one in the class had taken any notice of her absence. She knew there was definitely some assignment and that she couldn't do anything.

"Why did I come back? I could have stayed in a warm house and been left in peace. And now they've locked me in a reform school again... I don't want to go here!" She felt like she was trapped in a cage. Hundreds of people passed her, all the same, equally anonymous. Finally, however, she pulled herself together and headed for the physics classroom. It was always cold here. Dark, dark, and uncozy. She sat down at her last desk.

"Hi, Agatakoo," said Gosia, sitting in front of her, a sweet girl with platinum hair, blue eyes, a pink blouse, and always a lollipop in her mouth. "Why weren't you at school?" "

I wanted to commit suicide, but they saved me. I spent two weeks treating my nerves with my Angel, until we finally decided together that it was time to return to the womb," Agata said

. "You know what?" -Gosia snorted with her lollipop- I ask you about normal things, and you tell me fairy tales.

Agata looked at her from under raised eyebrows. Then she snorted with dismissive laughter and then stood up as Professor Kowalik entered.

"Hello, my dears," she said in her usual squeaky voice, "let's check our homework."

She walked through the rows of desks, finally stopping at Agata's desk.

"Well, Agata! Where's your homework?" she asked in a raised voice

. "I don't have it, Professor

." "And why is that?"

"Because I haven't been to school for two weeks.

" "What kind of explanation is that! You have to tell someone to explain it to you!"

Agata snorted with laughter

. "I don't know if anyone in this school understands anything you're explaining..." Agata began.

"Because you don't want to study! Because you're lazy! Because..."

"Because you explain it so well! No one understands what's going on!

" "How dare you raise your voice at me! Go to the first desk and write the test that was written when you were absent...

" "What?! Don't you understand that no one can explain this to me?? And do you know why??? Don't you understand yet??? BECAUSE! MADAM! WRONG! EXPLAINING!!! "

You'll regret it, my dear. You'll regret it." To the first desk.

Agata cast a murderous glare of her steely eyes at Professor Kowalik, grabbed a pen and paper, and, seething with rage, sat down with a thud in the first desk. The teacher handed her the sheet of paper with the sentences. Agata rested her forehead on her hands, her elbows on the desk, and tried to suppress her rising fury.

"Agata..." She raised her head. She saw the Angel. "Write: data. S=3m, v=95 km/h...

" 'What? Are you giving me a hint??? But... but whichever way you look at it, it's cheating... I mean... I'm happy, but can you do that???' she thought to the Angel

. "I can. Sometimes I can. Write: searched for t=?"

After half an hour, Agata had "solved" all the problems. She walked over to the professor's desk and placed the note down. Then she sat down and looked at Mrs. Kowalik with a superior smile.

"You replied," the teacher finally blurted out

, "Excuse me??????

"Of course I replied. You would never have written something like that yourself.

" "How am I supposed to reply??? From whom???" She swept her hand around the classroom. The desks around them were empty. Everyone tumbled into the last ones, pretending they weren't there.

"I don't know how, I don't know who. But you're getting a failing grade..."

At that moment, the class saw Professor Kowalik try to stand up but fall to the ground. And only Agata knew it was because Angel had tied the laces of the teacher's left and right shoes.

'Angel, that was awesome,' Agata thought as she walked down the hall.

"I know, otherwise I wouldn't have done it," the angel replied with a smile.

Professor Kowalik rose from the ground, untied her shoelaces, and looked around the entire classroom. Silence reigned. Everyone waited tensely for what would happen next. There wasn't a single person in the class who even slightly sympathized with the professor. When the teacher scanned all 32 students' faces, she saw not a trace of guilt. She picked up a pen and opened her journal.

"Agata gets an A for this test," she said in a flat voice, then left the classroom. As soon as the door closed, the entire class, with wild shrieks of joy, rushed to Agata, and then they lifted her high in their arms.

"Thanks, angel," she added quietly, smiling at everyone they had, "thanks.

" Agata's life improved. The angel helped her notice minor misfortunes that could be remedied, and she became a popular person in the classroom. And although she was still reluctant to indulge in after-school activities like her peers—she simply went home—she didn't feel lonely. An angel was always there for her.

One sunny day, as she was sitting in her room reading a book, the angel said,

"You know what... you've improved, I'm really proud of you. "

Agata smiled.

"Do you know what else I thought of?" she asked .

"Well? "

"About apologizing to my parents," she said

. "Oh, you see. And I think we'll have everything sorted out," he said with a strange, sad smile.

"Maybe I'll go to them now.

" "No... I mean, yes, of course. "

Agata gave him a searching look, then stood up and left the room. She went into the living room.

"Mom, Dad..." she began

. "Yes, Agata?"

Agata looked at her parents and suddenly realized how terribly, how terribly much she loved them, yet she never showed it to them. Tears welled up in her eyes.

"Mom, Dad... I'm sorry... I'm sorry I was bad. I'm sorry about that suicide attempt." I'm sorry I was picky, I didn't want to talk, I'm sorry I was pushy, I didn't listen to you, I'm sorry I never told you how much I love you...

Before long, she found herself in her parents' arms.

But when, after tearful assurances that from now on everything would be okay, Agata opened the door to her room, her heart stopped for a moment.

An Angel lay on the ground, appearing invisible and seemingly suffering.

"Angel, angel, what's wrong with you?" she cried, kneeling beside him.

"Nothing but... my mission is coming to an end. I'll have to go back There.

" "What??? You were always supposed to be with me." She suddenly realized how much she liked the Angel. After all, he had helped her so many times, done so much for her...

"I will, Agata, but not physically, I can't

." "No, you can't do this to me! Angel, I... I love you!" she screamed and began to cry.

And suddenly there was a flash of light, and there lay a boy beside her, an Angel, but without wings, dressed in jeans and a T-shirt.

"Angel... what are you doing? " "

Did you say that?

" " You

said that spell ."

"What spell, if you don't tell me what it's about..." Agata began, laughing harder and harder.

"That was the condition of my stay on Earth. Because I wanted to come back here. It's very good there, but I missed ordinary human life. I was promised I could take care of someone, and if that someone loved me, I'd stay here. And... I did. Now my name is Artur and I'm 19 years old.

"Artuś... I love you

—I love you too, Agatka," he said, hugging her tightly and then kissing her.