Blue dress

*

She tiptoed to the window, surprised at how he might hear her. She saw him from a distance and shivered. She didn't feel like seeing him today. She decided to pretend. Pretend she wasn't there. She was angry with him and wanted to punish him in this way. She shivered even more when he rang the doorbell of the rented apartment. "No, no, no! Don't ring! I'm gone!" She covered her ears with her hands. She began to rock back and forth. As if she were a small, unloved child. Her heart wanted something else, longed to see him, but her mind told her the exact opposite. "Silence... Finally, the long-awaited silence!" she said to herself, but suddenly the doorbell rang with double force.

"Magdalena, open the damn door!!! I know you're there!" He suddenly began pounding on it with all his might. "Oh God! What now? The neighbors will hear, they'll leave immediately, and then what? What am I supposed to do?" – she panicked. She tiptoed to the door and looked through the peephole. "Oh God, I can't keep him out! I have to make a decision immediately!" For a moment, she wondered what to do. She knew time was running out, that in a moment the neighbor, Mrs. Kwiatkowska, would open the door next door, spreading her snoopy everywhere, and then the whole building would know that the woman in apartment number four wouldn't let her lover in. "Oh, my dear, what have I done?" Suddenly, she made a decision. She flung it open.

"What are you shouting about? Do you have to?" she asked furiously. His face lit up with a broad smile, and just like the door, he strode into her small apartment.

"Well, I had to somehow persuade you to open this wonderful door. I know you're cheating!" He hugged her, standing like a log. Just a moment and she would let him do whatever he wanted to her. "It can't be like this, it's impossible. It has to stop, now!" She wrenched herself free from his tight embrace. She went to the kitchen. Having no choice, he followed her.

"Would you like some tea?" she asked casually, smiling. He looked at her and thought he'd gladly kill her for her calmness.

"Yes, please. But your special one." Preparing tea was a ritual for her, giving her plenty of time to reflect on this strange connection—not the connection that had brought them together. She began to reminisce

...

"How I hate such crowds!" she angrily pushed her way to her section of the bookstore. "For there to be so many people in a place like this? Since when have bookstores had so many people?" she wondered. Her anger grew. "I'll just find this book and get out of here. And then I'll go for coffee at Brama," she suddenly decided, reaching her section. For a moment, she searched for the book she'd been struggling for amidst the crowd. A man stood next to her. He was also searching for something here. But these books weren't the cheapest, and most often, this very place was always empty. "There it is! This is exactly what I need." She found her book and reached out to grab it. At the same moment, the man's hand reached for the same thing. Their hands touched, and she looked at him angrily.

"What now? There's no second copy..." she said, looking directly at the man.

"Nothing now, I'll definitely buy it because I need it, and what you do next is up to you. "Here we go," he said, shrugging and ignoring her, clutching the book tightly.

"Oh no, I won't allow that!" she said, holding it with him. "I didn't fight my way through all this crowd just to give up on this purchase! I'll buy it, and I don't care what you do," she said angrily, paraphrasing his words. They looked at each other as if they were about to kill themselves, just unable to decide which tool to use.

"Well, that's it, I won't give up, and neither will you. Let's bid then," he suggested suddenly, suddenly smiling at her.

"Let's bid?" she laughed sarcastically. "What's the point of bidding? But we really need to reach some understanding, because I really need this book too, and I need it urgently. And you don't seem to want to give up." She thought for a moment. "Maybe you could go to another bookstore, eh?" And I can easily take it…" she suggested.

"Since you don't like the idea of ​​an auction, and unfortunately, I don't have time to visit other bookstores, we need to prioritize. Why do you need this particular title?" he asked, still looking into her eyes. She considered the appropriate answer.

"You see, I've received a very urgent assignment and I have to use a program I know nothing about. And to learn it quickly, or rather, expressly, I need this book. So, what do you need it for?" she asked seriously. She wasn't joking.

"Well, I have a similar problem to you. I suggest you do this: I'll let you buy this book on one condition…" he paused, smiling gently.

"Oh, thank you so much for your kindness. I didn't expect to get such permission from you," she said sarcastically. "But before I laugh in your face, let me ask you what the condition is?" She smiled maliciously.

"First, we'll go for coffee, and secondly...

" "But that's two conditions!" she laughed, interrupting him. "But listen, what else do you have to add?" He looked slightly flustered, as if embarrassed by his impertinence.

"Well, you're right, those are two conditions. However, I think they're worth considering. Well, my second condition is that we simply work together..." He looked at her shyly. This surprised her. She stared at him for a moment, unable to believe he was serious.

"You've got to be joking, right? This is absurd!" she laughed, as if it were a good joke. Suddenly, she fell silent, looking at him. They eyed each other, she as if to reassure herself that he wasn't serious, he to show her he wasn't joking.

She liked him. He was considerably taller than her, but not taller enough to make her feel insecure. He wore a well-tailored suit, clearly tailored, and fashionable shoes. His hair was also cut short to the right length. Besides, it wouldn't suit him any longer. And those hands of his, long, slender fingers tipped with trimmed nails—it was immediately obvious that he took care of himself. He made her feel safe around him. Yes, she noticed it immediately. Although common sense told her it wasn't wise to go out with strange men anywhere. She hesitated. She didn't know what to do.

"Okay," she suddenly decided. "So, coffee first, or work together?" she asked boldly, looking at him. "Perhaps we can combine both?" He smiled broadly at her.

"I knew you were a sensible woman and you'd make up your mind eventually. I think we'll go for coffee first; we need to get to know each other a little before we can work together, right?" he nodded condescendingly. "But would you let me pay for the book?" he suggested.

"Okay, fine, let the book be yours," she agreed, dropping the book they'd been holding together the whole time. "So where should we go for coffee? I suggest we go here, not far away, to Brama. It's nice and friendly, and quite cozy...

" "No problem, Brama is fine. I don't know her, but that doesn't bother me."

He looked at her curiously. She wasn't ugly, but she wasn't beautiful either. She had that something he'd always admired in women, a childlike delicacy, though it was clear she was a mature woman. There was something in her eyes that unsettled him yet simultaneously made him feel safe. She was well-groomed. Dressed in a rather elegant suit, though he had the impression she didn't feel comfortable in it, she gave the impression she didn't even like him. He was curious about her. He was truly curious about the woman standing across from him. He felt he had to get to know her. And looking straight into her eyes, he had the impression that everything around him was turning green, ceasing to matter. There was something about her eyes that made it impossible to ignore. It was the first time something like that had happened to him. He was curious to see how it would develop. That was probably where the idea for that coffee came from, and then that ridiculous proposal to work together. He surprised himself, but then he was curious about her reaction. And he probably wasn't disappointed. She was brave, he had to give her that. She didn't seem like the type to date strangers. He wondered why she'd agreed to this coffee. He'd definitely ask about it... He

kept

surprising himself. He couldn't let go of her. She drew him like a magnet. He didn't know much about her; she refused to talk about herself, about her life. He only knew she had a young daughter. Sometimes he felt a longing to be a part of them, but she clearly kept him at a safe distance, as if afraid of such closeness. He didn't know if she had a husband or perhaps a close friend, and he knew nothing about the child's father. But he knew he wanted to be with her. He knew she wanted to see him. At least for now. There was a simple arrangement between them. They were together, simply giving each other a little pleasure. A no-strings-attached arrangement. No promises, demands, or requests. But it was starting to feel like more.

Perhaps he wanted something more, but he had to suppress all such feelings. He felt like a son of a bitch because, even though he loved spending time with her, he was planning his wedding. But not with her. She didn't know that yet, and he wasn't going to tell her, at least not yet. She was giving him what he wanted. He was giving her what she wanted. Nothing complicated. Sometimes he just felt like something much more important was bringing them closer. At least that's how he felt. She wasn't giving him any chance at anything else. That was how it was supposed to be, that was how it was. She didn't call him in the evenings, she never showed up at unexpected places, places where they might just happen to meet. And that was how it was supposed to be, that was how it was supposed to be. For both of them.

But one day, everything changed. Suddenly. He changed. And then he no longer knew what to do, what to choose. The wedding preparations, his own, were in full swing. Everything was already prepared. True, he felt enormous doubts that the woman he had chosen was the one, but he couldn't back down. Or perhaps he had just shown what a coward he was? He no longer knew. He decided to go on a short trip with Magdalena. A weekend getaway. One last time. He promised himself that he would then tell her he was getting married in a few days, that this was the end of their strange relationship.

She showed him around every corner of the city, known only to her. He learned that she had grown up here, by this sea, her beloved. She amazed him more and more. It was perhaps the first time she had opened up to him so completely. And he was about to turn out to be a scoundrel of scoundrels. But he had to, he had to be honest with her. Those dozen or so hours of fighting with himself had prevented him from enjoying the intimacy he longed for. And she made love to him so passionately, as if he were the most important thing to her. Sometimes he felt like she was giving him not only her body, but her soul as well. Something he had always wanted. And it was about to end…

*

"Do you feel how calming the sound of the sea waves is?" she asked, snuggling into him. She closed her eyes, listening to the sound. He looked into the distance, unsure of what to say. He turned her to face him.

"Yes, it calms me… I will remember these moments for the rest of my life, because they are something special to me," he whispered softly in her ear. There was something unsettling in his voice. She looked away from him.

"I have a feeling something is wrong… Is something wrong?" she asked anxiously. He looked at her sadly. He was starting to get nervous. He didn't know how to say what needed to come out of his mouth.

"Magdalena, listen…" he began hesitantly. She pulled away from his arms, sensing that these words would not be pleasant for her. "I have to tell you this, I simply have to, because I can't deceive you any longer..." She was starting to get nervous. She looked away from him warily, focusing her attention on him.

"Come on, tell me, don't keep me in suspense," she smiled nervously. "Tell me, what's on your mind?

" "I want to tell you that in two weeks I'm getting married..." He looked at her shyly. She was speechless. She stood speechless. She didn't know what to say. She just stared at him with surprise in her enormous green eyes. She was speechless.

"You must be mocking me right now..." she managed to choke out in a low voice.

"I'm sorry, but I had to tell you this, I didn't mean to deceive you. You know what connected us, you knew this wasn't a permanent situation..." he began to explain, as if trying to justify himself.

"You bastard!" she screamed. "How could you date me when you had someone else!?" She suddenly found her voice. She was furious that he had deceived her like that. "How could you?" she said quietly. "You're not only unfair to me, but to your future wife! Did you think about that when you were fucking me!?" she shouted again, trying to silence the growing pain within her with her vulgarity.

"Don't say that, please, you know that for me it wasn't fucking!" he said, his voice laced with sorrow.

"What was it? Tell me, what do you think it was? And with her, were you fucking too? Were you coming back from me and going to her?" she asked, utterly offended. He had hurt her as painfully as a man could hurt. He didn't answer her question, letting her know she wasn't the only one. Her shoulders slumped in helplessness. She turned on her heel and headed towards the guesthouse where they were staying.

"Magda, wait, please!" he shouted after the departing woman. He knew, felt, that he couldn't hurt her any more than he was now. He wanted to apologize, but he knew it was beyond him. He ran to her, and they walked in silence for a moment.

"What now?" she said quietly. She had resigned herself to the situation. She didn't want to fight for him, or maybe there was no one else to fight for? It hurt him a little that she hadn't even tried, but on the other hand, he seemed to understand her.

"Now? I don't know what now..." he replied. They were already reaching the guesthouse.

"But I know, now we'll pack the car and go home. Our homes. And then I'll pretend I never met you," she said with sudden certainty in her voice. The lost and helpless woman, and most importantly, the angry woman, was gone. He looked at her with admiration for not making a fuss, for not demanding the impossible. But he didn't realize how much it cost her. She buried her feelings and emotions deep inside, putting them all aside for a more opportune moment, for when she was alone and could cry in peace.

They set off from the hotel without speaking. They reached the city in the evening. As they said goodbye, she extended a trembling hand to him, revealing that she wasn't so indifferent after all.

"Of course, I'll give up the apartment, because there's no need to keep renting it, right?" she said quietly as they shook hands.

"Yes, give up," he replied. "Please don't hold a grudge against me. Maybe I'll explain it to you someday," he said quietly.

"I don't think so," she replied with a firm voice. "Goodbye. And good luck!" she shouted from the car. She drove to her house, driving off with a screech of tires. This was her way of showing how furious she was. She sped through the city, breaking every speed limit imaginable, as if to vent her anger

…

"Here, this is your tea." She placed two mugs on the kitchen table. Intimidated by her sudden presence, she didn't know what to say to him. He, too, suddenly lost his composure. They felt very awkward.

"So, are we going to be silent now?" she asked shyly, smiling at him.

"We can be silent for once. We had a lot of words between us last time, don't you think?" he asked, taking the mug of hot beverage in his hand. She just looked at him without answering.

"How's your marriage?" she asked suddenly, surprised that she could be interested in it at all. And yet, she didn't care at all.

"Things aren't working out," he said quietly. "Magda, I've missed you," he added suddenly.

"You have no right to miss me!" she said, angry at herself for showing him any affection. He touched her hand, caressing her fingers. Her heart began to beat faster. "I have to do something, or I'm about to lose control," she thought.

"You have no right to touch me!" she said loudly, withdrawing her hand. But the glint in his eyes betrayed her.

"Please, don't reject me now, right now. I need you..." he said softly. She looked him straight in the eye. And that was her mistake. She shouldn't have looked into his eyes in the first place, because she felt herself melting into a feeling for him she didn't want at all. With every second, she felt that she would be his, no matter the consequences. That she wanted to be in his arms even if the world ended. That in a moment something she didn't want, even though she desperately wanted it, would happen. Yes, she wanted him with all her being. And he sensed it...

They lay entwined in an embrace. Exhausted. Happy to have experienced this again. She smiled, content. She wouldn't trade this moment for anything. He gently kissed her forehead. She loved it when he kissed her like that.

"What will happen now?" she said quietly. He thought for a moment. He didn't really know what to say to her. In fact, he hadn't even planned it. He hadn't expected their meeting to end like this. Though perhaps he should have anticipated it? He knew how much he affected her, knew that despite her anger and resentment, she loved his kisses, adored his caresses, that they were something special to her. He didn't know she hadn't given up on him. But she had proven to him that nothing else mattered. It flattered him, it pleasantly tickled his male vanity. He didn't know what would happen next, he didn't know how it would all end. And above all, how. But he knew it would definitely end somehow; he didn't want to think about that right now. He wanted to think only of her.

"Hush, don't think about it now, it's not important. Focus on me better," and he kissed her again. He wanted this evening to never end. He wanted to give her everything tonight. And she took it as if she wanted to remember him this way. Time, place, didn't matter tonight...

*

"This will be our last evening," she thought, preparing for the meeting. "This will be our last night, and then I'll let him go. I'll demand he go." She pulled the blue dress he loved so much out of the closet, resolving with all the strength of her character that this would be the end of their relationship. "It can't go on like this anymore, I can't stand him coming back to his wife. I hate her for being able to have him and I can't. I hate her!" she repeated stubbornly, putting on her blue bra and the dress. She wore nothing else besides those two things. She knew it would make him white-hot. That was what she wanted. She wanted him to desire her like never before. "This will be a fitting punishment for him," she smiled to herself, pleased with the result. She looked at herself in the mirror with satisfaction. She knew what she was wearing would have the desired effect on him. She wanted to be promiscuous today, and she knew she had succeeded. She had booked a hotel room for it. She had planned everything carefully. The right wine, the right atmosphere. Everything was planned down to the last minute. Even her departure had been meticulously planned. She knew she would succeed. She knew this had to be it. This had to be it. There was simply no other way. This would be her revenge. Sweet revenge. She began to feel a little nervous as the time to leave the house approached. "I'll manage, I'll manage," she repeated, as if it were her mantra. She knew her time was coming...

Leaving the hotel room, she quietly uttered to herself a poem she had once read...

"A quiet hotel room

, you and I

sensually pull off

my blue dress, I see desire

in your eyes ... ...Today I will be a whore for you! I seduce you and I know that in a moment you will drown in me... ...I spread my thighs... so you can take me the way you like ...strong arms hold me tight... ...my nails dig into your skin - a gift for your wife and... and finally I scream... ...another name..." She knew she had won. But why didn't she feel any satisfaction? Tears began to flow of their own accord... This was the end of it all...