School Walls

 

Mati:

As always, we were standing by the school, waiting for the break to end. Some of us were standing behind the playground with cigarettes, chatting about the new "girls." A typical school scene... The bell rang, and a whole crowd of people rushed into the stall. We went into the 110th and sat down at our desks. The math guy, as usual, was yelling at us to be quiet... Karol got another warning. He was jumping on the desks... A bunch of idiots! I sat next to this girl from "Ten" (junior high school no. 10). She came for a scout. At least that's what the math teacher said. She had long legs, dark hair, and a pretty face. The teacher introduced her, and she stood up... "

Today is December 1st. World AIDS Day... That's why your principal told me to come here. I have AIDS... This is only the beginning of my illness, but I know I'm going to die. Not now, not tomorrow... Maybe in three years?" Maybe in five... I'm here to explain what it really is. I know most of you have encountered this topic and don't want to talk to me. This person can leave. They won't get a warning, a warning, or anything..." The girl was nice, and I listened willingly. Only one guy left. Daniel... He had a problem with heroin and didn't want anyone to bother him anymore.

"I won't tell you about unsafe sex with a new partner. People! We're all adults now that we know what sex is! Are you going to go to bed and what? Are you going to ask if he/she has AIDS? Absolutely not! I had a drug problem for a year. When I heard about what could happen to such a person, I would cover my ears or run away. My boyfriend helped me. He was also a drug addict. He took me to rehab and left... He visited me a few times until..." At that moment, she lowered her head and clenched her fist, "he left..." I learned of his death a few days later. I, my parents, and his sister were at the funeral. Thanks to him, I'm here... We talked until the end of class...

I was walking home with Daniel:

"Listen, man... Don't you want to stop this? You look pathetic. Skin and bones, you'll be smelling the flowers from underneath..." We both burst out laughing. We parted ways at Kaskiejska Street... I was slowly walking back to the cottage when I bumped into that girl with "ADIDAS" (aka AIDS). She was running to the bus stop. I spilled everything out of her briefcase... I shrugged and walked away. What am I going to help her with? My fault???

Sara

Cham! He didn't even apologize! I feel like kicking his ass, a loyal listener, phew! He kept staring at my legs... And now? Nothing! What a scandal! You're killing yourself, and they have no respect at all... For a fifteen-year-old, he's very handsome...

I was home by four. I did everything mechanically:

- I put the bed together,

- I turn on the music,

- I do my homework,

- then at 7:00 p.m. I eat dinner and at 8:00 p.m. I wash...

- 9:36 p.m. I sit and read in bed,

- 11:59 p.m. I go to sleep... See you...

Daniel

I've had enough! The constant nagging:

"Do it! Why are you dragging your feet?!", "Mom! He's high again!", "You come back like that and I'll THROW you out"... I'm so sick of it! I don't think I can stand it anymore and...................................................

Mati called to say he's coming over for the CD...

I'm sure what I'll do, but for now...

"I, Daniel, have a sincere will, by law, to give:

- My entire collection of hip-hop CDs to Damin,

- I want to give Mati my skateboard and all my "equipment," as well as my pornographic collection... (He knows where it is!)

- I'm giving my skateboarding stuff to my best friend - also a girlfriend, -

let the family take the rest... I also ask that my friend Mateusz never touch heroin in his life, not even for show. Don't let him waste his life like I did!........................................................"

I left the computer on and went to the window...

Mati.

His sister opened the door... She told me to go into his room... I wanted to scare him and suddenly ran into the room. All I heard was a crash and screams coming from the window... I looked at his computer... I stood there in astonishment, and regained consciousness when Amela (his sister) entered the room.

"Where's Dani?" she asked.

"He wasn't here..." Then something hit me and I looked out the window... HE was lying on the sidewalk! There was a red stain of blood around his head... Amelia and I ran downstairs... I picked him up by the shoulders... He opened his eyes for a moment and whispered something:

"Bye, man! Build up the bars!...You're the most..." He didn't finish. I felt like he had no strength left to speak. He squeezed my hand and...

Amelia

My brother wasn't always so stupid... He was practically great... He was the only one I could talk to, cry to... Sleep with him and talk to him until 3 a.m. He taught me how to kiss. Everything! It was enough that everyone in his entire life had said something bad to him for his world to crumble. He was a drug addict, but he could have gotten over it. However, he would have to struggle for the rest of his life with the knowledge that for a moment of pleasure, of oblivion, he had wasted his life... What am I going to do now?! He doesn't even know his mother left... She ran away from his father, and he was arrested for armed robbery...

I looked at Mati... I must have been crying, because his cheeks were wet... I'm twelve years old and I talk like a teenager... I put my hand on Dani's face and burst into tears. I screamed, "Why?!" "Why?!"... Mateusz hugged me:

"Everything will be alright," he said quietly.

"You don't believe what you're saying... I've lost the only support in my life. What if..."

"You sound like an old woman... Call an ambulance!

" Mati

Daniel's funeral was a disaster. No one came except me, my mother, and Amelia... The priest asked me to speak. I started talking about everything that had been inside me since that day..."(...) It's my fault. I ran screaming into the room, and he jumped..."

Three months passed. Amelia's mother came to take her home and thanked her for "taking care of her daughter."

I remember every single thing I did with Daniel. From the first joint to the conversation with him that day. I acted like a wimp. I fell into a bottomless pit; I couldn't bring myself to go to his house, even though I had the keys.

Almost everyone found out about Daniel's death... Except for his girlfriend, Majka. She was sick and spent the beginning of the year in a sanatorium. Arriving home, she met Amelia... She, of course, had to fly into hysterics and tell me everything... She came to me, accusing me of a stupid joke. I shook my head and took her to Daniel's apartment. I turned on the computer and showed her the will. Then I told her everything in detail. She took it all in stride, but I felt like she was about to start crying... She lowered her head and sobbed. After a moment, she wiped her tears, stood up, and... She grabbed a glass bookcase and threw it to the ground. I tried to calm her down, but she kicked me in the balls. I thought I'd be sterile for the rest of my life... (It really hurt). She ran away, and I never saw her again that day. A few weeks later, the doorbell rang... Maja's friend was standing at the door. "She slit her wrists..." I heard. She said she was staying at her house and didn't want to call an ambulance because she was drunk... Later, she found out, and we took her to

the hospital. A year has passed. I haven't seen either Amelia or Maja. I failed my exams, stayed in third grade, and I'm addicted to cocaine... There was heroin for a while, but I remembered Dani's request. I once went to school completely wasted. The guys only said, "Don't look Belfrom in the eye, you're completely 'dumb'," but one girl reported my "dumbness" because I was hitting on her. I felt embarrassed afterward, but I ignored it... My mother got upset because I heard her talking to a neighbor. She then said, "I know how Daniel felt. I lost my brother because he was 'using.' But I know that even if Mati came over high, I wouldn't say anything unless it caused problems." Unfortunately, there were problems. Once, at a guy's 18th birthday party, I got high and fell from the second floor. It was quite low, but I broke my collarbone and had a concussion. I put it aside and gave up. But a shadow kept following me, as if Daniel were saying I'd end up like him... I don't have a girlfriend, I'm trying to end it, but I can't, or they're holding me back.

Amelia

I didn't see the point in being bored. I'm trying to meet Mateusz, but my mother won't let me... I was chatting with a guy on GG. He said he'd set me up with him. A few days later, I spoke with Mati. He told me he was using coke... I got pissed at him because he'd promised himself and Dani he'd never touch it, and now? Drugs are his life. Even though he's three years older than me, I think he's lost it... I'd like to help him. We live 50 km apart.

It's summer vacation... I've saved up the money and I'll be going there soon...

Sara:

I had no idea that guy had died. It must have been terribly painful for his family... I made an appointment with some guy online for today. There's still an hour. I have no idea what to wear... It's incredibly hot. My options are a dress, a skimpy top and shorts, or a miniskirt. I don't even know what this guy looks like?! (Why should I dress up for him?) Plus, he's a skater... Bleeee!!! He'll be wearing baggy jeans, a black sweatshirt, and a red cap... Hmmm...

I'm here and there's no one like him here. Although?

- Hey! I'm Mateusz.

- Hello. I'm Sara... - He's quite handsome, but a bit too tall. Maybe 190cm. And he's 17 years old... Brown hair, blue eyes, and a nice smile. -

Where would you like to go...

- And you? - I know him from somewhere...

Mati.

That's the one with AIDS... I'm in trouble... Piotrek got me out of a bind. I forgot we'd arranged to go, and he showed up. The girl gave me her address and left.

Smok gave me some speed, and we went to his place.

- Do you want to go to a concert?

- With you?!

- And with whom?

- For what???

- Paktofonika

- Mmmmm... How much?

- Free...

- I got paid for the stuff, are you going?

- Of course I do.

- Do you want to invite someone? Maybe a girl?

- I don't know, I'll think about it...

- Okay. See you tomorrow! Bye

-bye,

Amelia.

A few more towns and I'll be there... I got out, it's 9:00 PM. It's pretty dark, what am I supposed to do? I pulled out my cell phone and dialed his house... Damn! No one's answering...

- You girl!!! - I heard. I saw five guys in front of me... They were all probably on their way...

- Yeah???

- Come here!

- You know what, I have to get lost, bye-bye! - I ran away. But two more appeared in front of me... They grabbed me and started groping me. Jesus... I felt unbelievable pain, they broke my arm... One of them threatened to kill me if I didn't give him a blowjob.

I started to struggle and scream, but no one was there.

- Leave HER!!! - a familiar voice... It was Mateusz... They started fighting. Oh God, another one came! What am I supposed to do?!

"Dragon! Get her out of here!!!" Mati shouted to the newcomer. The boy lifted me off the ground and covered me with his arm when some guy with a pocket knife (a slightly larger one) approached him. "Dragon" snatched the knife from him and started a fight. I felt quite strange. Suddenly I heard a scream, "No!!!"... It was Mati's friend. He shielded him from the knife blow. The attackers fled in terror.

"Dragon!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Mati grabbed him and helped him up.

"What are you doing here?!" he shouted at me, irritated.

"I'm sorry! I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry!!!" I ran away. Mateusz grabbed my hand. He saw my tears and hugged me.

"You stink of weed," I cried. He didn't say anything, walked over to his friend and knelt beside him...

"Dude, you don't believe in God!!! Get out of here!" They might come back here...

"I won't leave you here..."

I secretly pulled out my cell phone and called an ambulance. A few minutes later, it arrived...

Mati took me to his house and drove himself to the hospital... His mom was a little angry that I hadn't called sooner. Kasia and I were waiting for Mati... Suddenly, the phone rang. Mateusz's mom answered... I looked at her. Her eyes were wide open, tears streaming from them.

"Mati... he... is dying... He had an accident!"

I hoped it wasn't true... We went to the hospital. He was on a respirator. I felt terrible. It was my fault... Suddenly, a nurse appeared next to me. She asked if I wanted to talk to Piotrek. I had no idea who it was, but I agreed. We went into a room. There he was, Mateusz's friend. He looked at me... I couldn't help it and started crying. He slowly stood up and approached me...

"What's your name?" he asked.

"Ah, ah, ah, A

-"A" what?

-Amelia...

-You...are you the sister of the late Daniel?

-It was my fault...A few days before his, well...

-death.

-Exactly, we had a fight and I told him to kill himself...So he would die!

-Hmm...And I'm Smok...It wasn't your fault. It was your parents' fault. They didn't give him a chance, I know because I knew him since elementary school. Just like Mati. Listen to me carefully now...Mati is in serious trouble, he only had an accident because he messed with a certain gang. They were the ones who fucked up his car. You have to help Kasia...right?!

-Ms. Kasia?

-Yes, it's going to be hard for her now, you have to watch out for her and help her...right?!

-Okay, but what will happen to you?

-I won't betray my gang, but I will try...

-your gang??!!!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

-yes. you were talking to me on GG, and with me was a friend from... you know

- and they know everything?

- No, they don't know... if I can convince them of Mati's innocence, I'll call them. OK?