WINGS OF INDIFFERENCE

He slowly turned the handle, opening the door almost silently. He slipped inside, and as his eyes adjusted to the growing darkness, he glanced around the room. His gaze swept every corner he had once known so well. Memories flooded back. It was here, in this room, that he stood by the window every evening, gazing at the setting, fiery red sun. Always the same, old sun.

"Or maybe a different one?" He wondered about it every day. Back then, he'd still expected so much from life. He was still searching, though he didn't know what. Perhaps for some signpost that would show him the path to follow.

Full of hope, he believed he would fulfill his greatest dreams. The reality turned out to be completely different.

And finally, he stopped searching. He melted into a crowd of indifferent young people just like him. He couldn't find his place. Or maybe he didn't want to find it? Of course, he was aware, he sensed, that all was not well. But he did nothing to change it. He was drifting further and further away from his old life, all because of a growing fear of the unknown. At first, he tried to ignore his anxieties. But all his silent fears finally forced him to make a choice.

He finally made his decision today, in this room. It seemed to him that it was the only right option.

***

"They say people fear death most," he whispered softly, "But no one ever considers that it might be the other way around, that someone might be afraid of life. Like me. All my failures have destroyed me. I've had enough. I won't change myself..." His voice trembled, as if weakening. "I know it's impossible. There's only one thing left for me..."

He slowly walked to the bed across from him, surveyed the room one last time, and then flopped heavily onto the bed. He reached for the box of sleeping pills on the nightstand. He knew he'd chosen perhaps the most trivial way to end his life, but right now he wasn't particularly concerned.

He already had the package in his hand when some unknown force suddenly knocked it from his grasp. The pills scattered across the carpet, and the would-be suicide collapsed onto the pillows. He fell asleep… or perhaps lost consciousness.

***

He woke up in a completely unfamiliar place. It was overcast, the sky obscured by thick, leaden clouds. A storm was approaching, and a strong, piercingly cold wind was blowing.

He felt uneasy. A strange feeling came over him, that he was supposed to be here at some point, but for some unknown reason, he hadn't reached his destination. Somewhere far off on the horizon, he saw buildings, like a city… Lacking other ideas, he set off. He longed to get out of there as quickly as possible. He just had no idea how to do it.

He reached the city gates surprisingly quickly. He entered them, filled with apprehension. The city looked completely deserted, as if no one had lived there for years. Incidentally, it felt as if no human had ever lived here... and that wasn't a pleasant feeling.

"I can't stand here forever," he muttered to himself, trying to reassure himself, but the mention of the word "eternity" sent shivers through him. Finally, he set off. On a nearby building, he noticed an arrow painted: "GO THERE!" He headed in the indicated direction, and suddenly... a clerical desk appeared before him, with a woman sitting at it.

"Excuse me! Could you tell me where I am?"

The mysterious woman looked at him piercingly. When their eyes met, he felt, to say the least, strange. He was almost certain she wasn't a living being, not human. He steeled himself and almost opened his mouth, but this incredible woman beat him to it:

"Is your name Artur Darewicz?" "She said in a hypnotizing voice.

"Y...yes..." he choked out, completely surprised. "How do you know who I am? And what's going on here?" Surprise didn't exclude irritation.

Artur didn't receive an answer, but he did hear the strangest sentence in his thirty years of existence:

"The data is correct. You've been accepted into the 'Wasted Life Recovery Program.'"

"I'm sorry, did I mishear something??? I don't understand something...

" "And I don't have to explain anything to you," she shrugged. "That's not part of my job description. I hope the guide will clear up all your doubts. Goodbye!

" "But..." he didn't finish. The woman disappeared as suddenly as she had appeared.

Artur felt completely lost.

"If this is a dream, I want to wake up!! And if the only way out of here is death, then I want..." The last word died in his throat.

"This isn't a dream. You're in a real world, but one inaccessible to everyone." And whoever enters here willingly once will never die again. You can't die twice. Arthur heard these words spoken in a warm, friendly voice. From somewhere behind him. He turned sharply, and what he saw exceeded his wildest expectations. It terrified him…

He saw… himself. From a distance, the man seemed identical. The same mid-length, curly black hair. The same high forehead, height, and gait.

The man slowly approached Arthur, who was afraid to look at the "stranger."

Finally, he hesitantly raised his gaze, expecting to see bright green eyes like his own. This time, he was wrong. It was the first time he had seen such incredibly black eyes… Eyes whose irises were indistinguishable from their pupils.

***

"The only difference is the color of our eyes," the stranger said in a voice that was simply breathtaking.

"We're... the same person..." Arthur hesitated at first, but he had to know.

"I can't tell you anything," Arthur II explained.

"You can't die twice." Is this the Land of the Dead?" Arthur expected the same answer as before, but saw a curt nod.

"So I'm already dead? Simply wonderful." He visibly saddened. He'd completely forgotten

what he'd wanted to do not long ago.

"Don't worry. You still have plenty of time. It's up to you whether you want to use it properly.

" "I don't understand something again.

" "I'm here to make you understand. You just have to try." Arthur II smiled. "

Now let's go. I'll show you around.

" ***

"So this is the Land of the Dead..." Arthur wondered aloud.

"Not the only one," his twin brother from the afterlife interjected. "There could be an infinite number of them." After death, every person finds themselves in a place that best reflects their life on Earth.

"Hmm... If someone has spent their entire life trying to accept life as it is, without unnecessary self-pity over the hardships of existence... then... will they find themselves in a land of eternal happiness after death?

" "Exactly," confirmed the black-eyed Artur Darewicz

. "So it's that simple..." sighed the green-eyed Artur Darewicz

. "Nothing is as simple as it seems.

" "Sometimes it's hard to understand you."

His mysterious companion didn't answer, looking him in the eye in silence, and then spoke quietly:

"Wouldn't you like to know the name of this place?" Seeing the nod, he added, in a strangely changed, dull, and low voice. "It's the Land of Eternal Indifference." He gestured around: fog, a dark, overcast sky, sad, gray, and abandoned buildings. Both men's hair was ruffled by an icy wind, destroying everything in its path. Artur felt an immense sadness and resignation. And he realized that these feelings had actually accompanied him from the very first moment he arrived.

In that same moment, they were transported to a different, yet equally depressing place.

***

They found themselves in a garden. No one had any idea what "green" looked like. Everything was gray, expressionless. Arthur looked around more closely and saw countless people wandering around the garden. Ghosts, in fact. He heard his guide, whose voice had never regained its warm, friendly tone:

"Indifference, resignation, dullness, sadness, numbness, despair. They all feel no positive emotions. And so it will for all eternity. They will deserve it themselves...

" Arthur couldn't bear it anymore:

"Stop it!! Can't you see I can't stand it anymore?? Why did I end up here?? Who exactly are you??!! And why are you telling me all this????

"Haven't you figured it out yet?" the black-eyed man asked dully. "You too will spend eternity here if you don't change."

***

They emerged from the city gates, into the open space. Arthur moved as if in a trance, nothing reaching him.

"I think you understand everything now..." Arthur II tried to smile, and his seemingly identical companion nodded with effort.

"There's something else I'd like to show you. Look at the city gates. "

Arthur obediently raised his eyes in the indicated direction and read the inscription:

"You who enter here, abandon all signs of life, for you will be forever surrounded by the wings of indifference." "

Live life to the fullest. Cast off indifference, for it will only lead you here. Change, remember what you were before." Rip off the veil that obscures the real world from you. Wake up every morning knowing you have a reason to wake up. Don't despair. I know you can. Arthur heard that warm, gripping voice within him.

And he made his decision. He smiled, looking into the black eyes of his mysterious twin brother. And he didn't need to ask. He understood.

Arthur finally spoke after a long silence:

"Just tell me one thing. Who are you, exactly?

" "Everyone has a guardian. Some accompany a person for the rest of their life. You no longer need me."

Then he disappeared.

At that same moment, a strong shiver shook Arthur's body. Then he fell limp to the ground.

***

He woke up in his bed. The first rays of the rising sun were streaming into the room.

Arthur remembered every scene from the strangest journey of his life. Had it all really happened? He couldn't believe it.

Suddenly, he heard his own, weak, trembling voice within: "I won't change myself... I know it's impossible." Another, wonderfully warm and soothing whisper answered him:

"Nothing is impossible, you just have to want it. Try to change. Don't forget how you should live. I believe you will succeed." Artur knew from the first moment who that voice belonged to. And he had a feeling he would never hear it again. Then he stood up, hurriedly opened the door, and went out into the street

.

For the first time in his life, he felt like he'd finally seen the light. For the first time, he truly lived. It was incredible. He was bursting with joy and energy. Now he believed every word of "his brother from another world," as he called him. Suddenly, he heard the voice of his friend, Paweł, behind him. But could he still call him his friend? They'd last seen each other a long time ago, and Artur hadn't treated him very kindly then. "We can always try," he thought to himself, and turned to the pleasant, tall blond man, who was still standing in the same place, watching him intently. Artur approached him, full of foreboding, but Paweł smiled, calling out,

"Artur, so many years! What are you doing here?"

Darewicz finally approached him, and Paweł continued with a satisfaction that seemed quite sincere:

"You know, I'm really glad to see you—" He stopped abruptly as he took a closer look at his friend's face—

"Artur!! Your eyes! What happened to you?? Artur!! – the addressee didn't hear the final screams, as he frantically ran to a nearby clothing store and burst into the changing room at lightning speed. He looked in the mirror and… Thoughts and images swirled inside him like crazy… As if he wanted to make sure it was all real.

In the mirror, of course, he was looking at himself, but with one significant difference.

“You tricked me,” he said to the interlocutor known only to him. “You said I didn't need you anymore. But actually… thanks, Artur! I always wanted black eyes. But… how did you know?” Smiling, he continued the “conversation,” which for the uninitiated would be a typical symptom of madness, and the person in question would immediately qualify for a straitjacket.

“Don't be ridiculous. What do I care about your preferences?”

Artur pretended not to hear.

“Where are you, Artur?” he asked

. “Closer than you think.”

THE END