The Cat

This happened to me for no apparent reason, without any logical explanation. After receiving a significant promotion at work, I bought a nice apartment in a new building. Admittedly, apartments in this building are expensive, so there were only three other people living in our building besides me.

I'm a night owl, so it's not surprising for me to be up until the early hours. And then, on one of those completely ordinary days, I heard my doorbell ring. I was surprised, but opened it. Not a soul was there. Looking closer, I realized there was a "soul"—a cat was sitting right across from my door. She looked at me with attentive yellow eyes, stood up languidly, rubbed herself against my leg, and meowed briefly, questioningly. I love cats, I really do, so I decided to feed my unexpected neighbor. I thought long and hard about who had given me the animal—surely it couldn't have been Shurik the security guard. The cat felt right at home, and it was very convenient to have her in my empty apartment, so I decided that from now on we would live together. But the next day, when I returned from work, I found no sign of the cat. The doors and windows were closed, I remember it distinctly, everything was in its place, but the cat was gone.

A week passed. I think it was Tuesday—I arrived quite tipsy and not alone. Actually, our company had thrown a huge drinking party, and I dragged my attractive secretary, Lenochka, "over for a cup of tea." However, either Lenochka didn't like that I didn't offer her any tea and immediately moved on to the more enjoyable part of the evening, or perhaps her eternal feminine bitchiness had awakened, but after calling me a series of nasty names, she fled my apartment, slamming the door. Actually, I was drunk, and it didn't bother me one bit. Thinking that all women are fools, I went to bed. 

Suddenly, I woke up with a curious sensation – there was clearly someone lying next to me, and this "someone" was a woman, and a woman who clearly wanted to spend the night with me. "Lenochka's back," I thought wryly. I didn't turn on the light, but you can guess what happened next...

I found the morning in my bed, splendidly alone. I could hear the sound of running water in the shower. I peered into the bathroom – yes, there it was, the curtain drawn, and a silhouette behind it. I felt embarrassed about yesterday, even terribly ashamed. I didn't want to look her in the eye, so, muttering something in greeting, I left for work. In the entryway, a security guard called out to me and told me that my girlfriend from yesterday had run out of the building and returned shortly afterward – she'd remembered I'd forgotten my purse. But my door was locked, and I didn't answer the phone. So, can I reimburse her for the money Shurik gave her for the taxi—she is my lady, after all?

It was slow to dawn on me what had happened. And, you know, I still don't understand anything. I returned to the apartment with a friend, packed my things, and left for another place.

Or maybe it was... the cat? I laugh. I laugh long and hard. It was funny. Totally amusing.