It's snowing, it's snowing....

She was looking for someone to go cry to.

And she didn't need anyone anymore. She spoke all her grief to the wall, which, admittedly, didn't listen, or at least didn't interrupt. Touching the wet mirror, she channeled all her rage, everything she felt, into the simple gesture of crying. And the mirror only mimicked her, but she much preferred seeing her tearful twin before her than

the worried face of someone who couldn't understand her feelings.

Sitting there, she felt she wasn't alone.

Someone turned on the light. She couldn't see, didn't want to see... She turned her back to hide her tears and waited for the person to leave. She didn't hear the door slam. Nor the creak. It didn't close again.

"Agata?" someone asked. She was so sleepy, so heavy, so... tearful, that she didn't recognize the voice. And yet she knew it well. "Agata... What's wrong with you?"

She felt two girlish hands on her shoulders and tried to swat them away. The girl sat down on the mattress next to her. Agata didn't even bother to look at her. She knew what she would see: concern, friendship. Only one of her friends was naive enough to approach her during her depression.

"What's wrong with you? Agata?" she asked with concern. Agata pulled away from her. Her behavior signaled her to leave, but Klara was stubborn. The most stubborn of her "friends."

"Agata, tell me!"

"No. Klara, piss off. You don't know anything," Agata said coldly.

Klara pressed her for an explanation. She almost begged. But Agata denied it once again, and Klara had to take drastic measures. When Klara said she was going after Piotrek, with whom Agata had long been in love, she thought she would win. She was wrong. Some things can depress you so much that even love loses its meaning.

"You wouldn't dare," she heard from her friend.

"A bet?"

"If you dare... If you do..." She trembled with anger. "I really won't have a reason to live anymore."

"Agata..." Klara stammered. "You...? Suicidal thoughts? What possessed you, girl?! What... What..." She couldn't find the English words to describe how astonished she was by that sentence.

Once upon a time—now it seemed so long ago—they had been fascinated by English and decided that to practice it, they would use it every day. They would try to express it as much as they could.

Agata, Klara, Lena, and Danusia swore to this.

"You want to know what happened?" Agata snapped. "Ask Lena, I think she'll tell you in detail. After all, she's your friend..."

"No one who isn't your friend will be mine." "Klara declared. Agata was surprised—she'd expected Klara to ask why Lena wasn't her friend too. But she wasn't disappointed.

After a moment, Klara added more quietly:

"Why didn't you say 'our friend'?"

"Go to her. I won't explain anything to you," Agata growled harshly. Klara tried to breathe calmly, but Agata felt her heart pounding. "Don't worry about me. You've been a good friend, but don't let me down now."

"I WILL NOT LEAVE YOU," Klara snapped. When Agata was furious at the whole world, and she didn't care about her tone. "You'll commit suicide, and I have no intention of being responsible for that! You're my friend, Aga, you know that!"

Agata just shook her head. Too much had happened to forget, too many tears had shed because of Lena, and too much time had been spent with the police psychologist.

Since her brother's death, Agata hadn't been able to get her bearings. Her mother recommended she see a psychologist. The policeman who had handled Tomek's murder case suggested a police psychologist. Agata had withdrawn from school for a while. The school president, Lena, was spreading offensive gossip, even though she was Agata's friend...

Or at least Agata thought so.

Worse still, that wasn't the end of Lena's contribution to Agata's well-being.

"Strączkowska, are you alive?!" Klara snapped when Agata didn't respond for a moment. The girl snapped out of her reverie and laid her head on her knees.

"I guess," she replied, lost in melancholy. Finally, she broke down. She spoke her mind. She finally wanted to say it, but she couldn't put it into words anymore. "But... But... Her and Darek..."

"Stop it! Darek... Darek is nobody.

" "But... Lena...

" "Lena... Hmm... Well, the same can't be said about her, but she's the voice of the school. You know some people don't listen to her."

"So what, I have to hang around with people who write 'Fuck you' in the restrooms?" Agata said, getting angry. Klara shook her head, knowing it wouldn't be easy to reason with Agata.

She, too, was shaken by everything that had happened. Too fast, too much; she couldn't comprehend it all. She wasn't surprised Agata was lost. There was no one to help her. Lena had turned away from her at the worst possible moment. And she took Danusia with her.

Ever since the police officers had knocked on Agata's door, investigating, her life had become complicated. There were three suspects in the murder of Agata's brother. Agata had taken it the hardest. She hadn't cried, she'd never asked for help.

She'd remained silent.

And that was the worst.

She'd remained silent, trying to cope with it alone. She couldn't.

Agata leaned against the cold, mirrored wall, trying to forget.

As she watched the snowflakes swirl outside the window, she thought that winter wasn't so bad. Snow buried worries and cooled them, allowing her to look at them objectively.

Somewhere in the distance she heard a song: "It's snowing, it's snowing..."