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I met her at Kasia's party. I'd seen her somewhere before, because I recognized her face, but I never expected her to become so familiar.

Dark blonde. Lush, straight hair flowing freely over her shoulders. Blue eyes. Blue, actually. Like the sky. A calm expression, tiny, red lips.

She didn't seem to be enjoying the party very much. From the start, she was sitting on the sofa, sipping a drink and finishing her cigarette. Bored with the company at the party, I became interested in her eyes. I walked closer.

"Free?" I asked. She

nodded.

"How are you having fun?" I asked as another minute of silence passed. I don't really know why I asked.

"As you can see," she mumbled, staring into her empty glass.

"Shall I get you some more?" I stood up.

"No, I don't drink," she replied.

A moment later, I returned with a glass of wine.

"Tell me, where exactly do you live?" I asked.

"On Lipowa Street," she replied

. "And you?" she added.

"On Bór Street."

We talked for a while longer. I told her about my passion for horses, but after a few minutes, I noticed she wasn't interested at all. She completely zoned out. She

seemed to be contemplating something.

Suddenly, she stood up, grabbed her jacket from the rack, and walked to the door. When I ran up and asked if I could walk her, she refused.

***

The day promised to be ordinary. Another summer morning. Coffee, email, and another argument with my girlfriend. That's how the day flew by. That evening, I desperately wanted to go for a walk. I had a feeling something was going to happen...

Back then, I didn't know I could trust her. I thought more and more about the girl from the party. I wondered where she was and what she was doing. Lost in thought, I reached the railway crossing. I heard the whistle of an approaching train. When I instinctively looked to the left, someone was lying on the tracks, a few meters away. Another train sounded. I ran in that direction as fast as I could. Some girl. It was her. Her eyes were closed, her body rising gently and calmly from the vibrations of the tracks. I started shouting to her, but there was no reaction. I picked her up, catching her halfway, and jumped onto the grass. It was a split second. When we reached the ground, the train was passing where we had been a second earlier. Thousands of thoughts raced through my mind. I started talking to her, waking her up, gently patting her face. She was nothing.

"Probably the drugs..." I thought sadly.

I carried her to a friend who lived alone. My friend understood the situation, we put her on the couch, and I was supposed to come see her tomorrow. He said she'd need me.

The next day I came, but she was gone. He also didn't know how she'd gotten out, when, or why. By eight o'clock, there was no sign of her

...

A few days later, we met by chance at the mall. I approached her and, without saying hello, said,

"How are you feeling?

" "Fine..." she muttered and walked away.

"Then when I saw you, I..." I grabbed her hand.

"Thanks for saving me, but you really didn't have to. It was my decision. And now I have to go." She pushed my hand away and tried to get away from me again.

"Remember, you can always come and talk to me, the address is in your jeans!" I didn't stop her anymore.

***

I wondered if she would ever contact me. I passed by the train tracks a few times—just in case—but she wasn't there. We didn't see each other for a few days—for me, it felt like an eternity. Even though I'd gotten used to life without her, there was something about her that I loved. I couldn't bear the thought that she might simply be gone...

***

One day, I had a very serious conversation with Julia, my girlfriend. We wanted to talk. She was the first to say she wanted to break up. I nodded. We became friends...

I didn't feel empty, even though I was alone. I was walking home through some old neighborhood. It was late evening. Homeless people lay on the ground around me, trash cans were burning, and something drew me there. I felt a sadness—if SHE were here... I had no reason to go home, and no one to go to. I sat down on some cloth. I closed my eyes. The wind blew gently. I opened them and rubbed them at least five times. On the other side lay someone covered with rags. "Probably a drug addict, there are plenty of them here," I thought, but I approached anyway. I pulled back the blanket. That was what I was afraid of. SHE. I checked her pulse. I heard whispers. She was delirious. Feverish. I called out to her. She was mumbling. She started shaking. The tremors lasted a moment, but they kept repeating. Finally, they stopped for good, just like her pulse. I tried to hear her heartbeat. Silence. I screamed, pleaded, shook her. I'd known her for such a short time. I couldn't help her, or maybe I could? Why wasn't I there? Her shirt was wet from the waterfall of my tears. I hugged her tightly and fell asleep.